It was Day 6 of my twelfth mission trip to Honduras. Our team was blessed to help serve soup, bread, and coffee to the patients and their families at the hospital for the poor in Santa Rosa de Copan. Neither my eyes nor heart were ready for the experience though.
In the States, death and dying are hidden behind tubes and machines and curtains and isolation. In Third World countries death and dying is exposed and raw. For many, an extremely hard life only paves the way to a tougher time of dying. On the day of our visit, I walked past bed after hospital bed stealing a glance or two into pain filled eyes. Each bed was hugging the walls of the ward so tightly that for some of the patients it might be as close to touch as they would feel in their last hours or last days. Others, destined to become well, would leave to once more face the hardship of living. I am not sure who is more fortunate in this place: the dying or the living.
There is no doubt that life for all of us is tough. It is faith-sobering, even for the strongest soul. I have come face to face with my own mortality, but I must confess living scares me more. While there are sacred moments and tender times, living can mean too many dark nights of the soul and relentlessly long days of pain. Death would seem to be a reprieve to our living. We are not as afraid of death as much as we are of dying though. Dying never looks pretty. We may fight to take each breath. With some awareness, we might see those who love us most watch our struggling with heartbreaking angst. We wish we could bypass the dying part and go straight to death.
But then there is a spiritual application. Scripture teaches us that God uses both our living AND our dying to draw Himself to us and keep us in a love relationship with Him: “For I am sure that NEITHER DEATH NOR LIFE, nor angels or rulers, NOR THINGS PRESENT NOR THINGS TO COME, nor powers, nor heights nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8: 37-39) The more living I experience, the more dying I do. The more dying I do, the more self is put to death. And the more self that is put to death, the more Jesus will be living in me. “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.” (Galatians 2:20)
Dying to live. We are only alive because because He is…
Reflections From Under The Broom Tree 